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Was this part of what you believed?


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Misaligned 04:49
Should we just carry on Our fire's dance around The creature looming in the river's bed A spell beneath the ground Threw the hill upside down If we're all leaving, where do we run to? Was this part of what you believed? I couldn't say I couldn't say What was that hidden in the ruins? Left over me Left over me This is a heart, and that's what you're beating Is that enough, Is that enough ? Cause since you fled the scene What remains is obscene I guess the layer left is just for show And burried in concrete The proof you swore to keep Some kind of error shaped the tumor's glow Why don't you take the whole Since nothing else is sold We burnt the rubber, we'll inhale the glue And since the head won't fall And there's no road back home How many parts were we severed into Is this the game? Is this the game? Should I still listen? What should I blame? And what's your name again? What's your name again? I see you shouting But I can't hear a thing
I think you took the world away from me I'm spelling the letters, of words I can't pronounce I forget everything I say To be anything with colors It's all I can't renounce I'm clearing the night off of me My arms they turned into The blood, the sea The rift under the current The light is colder than it used to be What is it telling me What do I see Is it the downfall, and does it set you free Our body talk Just cut the hands The sight without the eyes A clean horizon spreads I'm leaving for the hill Following two heartbeats And nothing reaches And nothing reaches Through I'm clearing the night off of me My arms they turned into The blood, the sea The rift under the current The light is colder than it used to be What is it telling me What do I see It's all just clay It's all just clay Until someday It all melts away Don't derail the play Don't derail the play Don't disturb today Don't disturb today You can't see me Cause I've lost my face long ago Is it the sound of your army ? What are they shooting at so randomly ? If we all die in a few weeks, Whatever you answered Noise covered it
Undo Me And the futures I hold This rhythm I should know, my storie's told Dismantel the prose, untethered and exposed Just leave it a blank space Close the door Make it unclear, make it vulnerable I'd like to hear the birds Or whatever grammar the world kept from me Don't spell it I suppose Don't lower, don't oppose What are the odds I missed the score I'm the tree's branches and open core Untangle me Drill through the floor Spread the news that I'm out for a stroll And won't come back Walk past me Turn around We're crossing a red line We've left the track Defy the percentage All bodies at the edge of merging inside me Half this, half that You made your way Now wreck it all Don't leave a single tower standing Put on display One last call Then destroy the neighboor's house, wall to wall
We should be the ones you look at if you don't mind us staying this fire keeps us breathing fate won't answer our questions for us we're a swarm whose form keeps changing the droning noise you keep hearing It feels like the walls are moving Slow ripples softly closing The surface spin is our bearing We'll blow up the bridge and learn to swim There's a sound that keeps on ringing Almost unheard, but undying. Doors keep opening up But everything's locked down And the space between us Is spreading on the ground Half of the pieces are missing What is it we were naming ? What color shapes the morning ? We tried all the shades on the margin, I'm unsure of my own writing I doubt the pictures I'm drawing Above us the dam keeps breaking We're the line under its failing The delta's angle widening Remains of our palms adorn the wall There's a force around the building Your glory signed your undoing Doors keep opening up But everything's locked down And the space between us Is spreading on the ground Now would you be so kind We just won't wait around Contortions near my hand Muscles bending the ground
Please Please feed off my eyes My love It's such a brutal space we're in And I'm unsure the wind's still reaching So take your time My voice's a trap my tongue keeps falling into Scattered bits of words I feed back to the swamp One by one Please Please drift off my back My love Paint anything you can't define Sever the ties before we're freezing Cut the anchor's rope


“Was This Part of What You Believed?”

I started this project a few months ago, but it feels like years apart. I had a few topics in mind, things I knew moved me deeply, forces I felt I had to try and channel into *something*. But I didn’t expect to fight my way through what fell upon us in the stretch of the last few weeks to get these ideas out of my chest and into a body of work.

Most like everybody, I have been all at once fascinated, terrified, and uplifted by the variety of chaotic situations we had to wander through at accelerated speed, some of them new, some of them old. Insisting on living and remaining creative in the middle of all of it felt both like a welcome exit and a daunting, suffocating task.

It struck me at some point that it was what I kept writing about: chaos. Not the all-powerful one outside, not the immensity of it, not as a whole. Chaos from my window into the world, chaos from the only visions of it I get to experience and what I make of it, chaos as the only tangible material of life within which to choose what to believe, and what to reject. The tipping point in your inner monologue where no fact can tell you what to think anymore, and you have to decide for yourself. The bottom of the lake.

Chaos, but also the lack thereof sometimes, because as we recently experienced, there can be much dread and destructive power in stillness, and so much can be achieved through successfully generating chaos. How do you make it yours; how do I join it? How do we, together, invoke it? As I’m writing this, people are roaming the streets, risking their physical integrity to cause havoc, so that they can finally be looked at and respected, because as a cohesive conscious force, they understood chaos will be the only available tool powerful enough to redefine the codes of the stale and stagnant forces that rule upon us. I wanted my music to invite some of that energy inside.

This is up to this point my dearest and most personal work. I wish for it to be a way for me, as a single entity, to join a wider body, to belong in a way, be part of an ensemble that doesn’t know me and still that I could call my own. I put a lot of instruments I didn’t play in a while in it, a lot of sounds I felt were threatening to how my work could be perceived, but that I nevertheless loved, and I let go of any restraint I might have had in the past. But more simply, I want it to feel like a few songs, a voice and a mess of instruments emerging from the noise and returning to it. And in between the shape of something I could define.


released September 17, 2020

MOWUKIS is a solo project by Louis-Louise Kay.

All songs written, composed, performed by Louis-Louise Kay
(except track 3 written and composed by Louis-Louise Kay & Angèle Towt)

Mixed and Produced by Louis-Louise Kay
Mastering by Cem Oral at "Jammin Masters" / Berlin
Recorded at [partial:order] / France
Graphics Design : T1W2


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